If god made anything better than pussy, he kept if for himself.
Pain pills are just bitch mints.
Me: Santa, for Christmas can I be with my crush?
Santa:….
Me:….
Santa: What did I tell you last year
Me:…..
Santa:……
Me: That that’s called kidnapping
Santa: Yep.
I’m sorry you can’t listen to Queen or Elton John because they’re both homosexual.
What’s with all of the festive ass porn?
I bought a second Nazi helmet yesterday, It is shipping, but I don’t know when I’ll get it.
When I get bored I do the randomest crap
Guess who is now a minister.
Have you ever wondered what happens when a cop tickets another cop?
It’s just like ticketing any other person appearently
I think it’s wierd that we have to wear clothes
If we want to be nude in public
We should be able to
What’s the problem with a dick here and a couple of tits there
So what
We all have genitalia
Why should we have to cover them
I like it when people send/add commentary on posts.
Y'all always like my work but you run such innocent profiles.
I see through your veils.
I’ve noticed that I went from porn and occasional stuff here and there to porn and such.
And that this has replaced facebook and other forms technological semi-asocial communication.
Other people cheering for football
“Fumble!… Incomplete pass!”
Me
Damn, that bitch dropped that ball!
I feel like researching serial killers and brutal murderers/dictators may not be the best thing to do for no reason other than ‘because I can’
I promise I’m not going to kill anyone
And even if I was I’d probrobly be researching how to do that
And I have no intention to.
I have been getting a lot more fan mail and a lot less hate mail
I guess these people don’t like it when you’re an asshole to them, I’d never guess
I used to be a wimp like you, until I got Anchor Arms.
I used to think there was no such thing as perfect
Until I met you.
If I kept my thoughts in a journal or diary or whatever, it would be full of me thinking of how I can get out of doing stuff I don’t want to do, remembering things I forgot to do, coming up with short rhymes, and pages upon pages of my crush’s name and stuff we did
I used to want to go to heaven
Now that I’ve met you I know that heaven’s overrated.
Almost all of us have someone we’d kill for
Less of us have someone they’re more than willing to die for
Even fewer would do absolutely anything possible for someone
And I have someone who I feel all three of these about
If only I had some way to tell her.
Baby I’m-a Want You
Iris
You’ve Got It
Faithfully
Right down the line
So caught up in you
Time in a bottle
Iris
You’ve Got it
Faithfully
Right down the line
Iris
You’ve Got It
So, Iris or you’ve got it? You decide which is better, because I can’t
So message me or kik me please to let me know